Monday, January 16, 2012

"But Dancing is Hard"

Well, when you don't get a lot of commenters, you need to work with what you get--thankfully repeat Daddy W.B. Picklesworth is up to the task.  Hearty congratulations to him and Mall Diva on the birth of little Abigail, by the way.

Now think about the comment "But dancing is hard."

Or, better yet, get yourself and your date--I presume your wife or someone who could become your wife--ready for the dance.  Let's do a checklist:

First, let's find some music suitable for dancing.....unless you want to emulate a lewd act in public, the sad fact is that outside of country music, there isn't a whole lot of recent stuff that will get your feet moving.  Don't even get me started on my recently divorced "cousin."  For that matter, even country & western is getting "rockish."  Great for the mosh pits of my misspent youth, not so good for gracious movement with one's helpmeet.

Lessee....a skirt for one's wife that's suitable for dancing.  Oops, finding something with a bit of ease in it for the beautiful lady in my life is a little bit difficult--you're going to need to go to a specialty store, or at least fairly upscale.  The same goes for a blouse that won't show more than a lady wants to show in public.  Do-able, but not easy.

Now, let's find a pair of low heel shoes (Ginger Rogers could dance in heels, but I'm not ready to risk my wife's ankles) with a leather sole with just the right "slide" to let her move gracefully.  Looking....looking....looking...let's just say that it's a good thing there are shops dedicated to providing shoes for dancers not interested in breaking their ankles.  OK, it took some work, but we did it.....

......looking now for a good dance floor.....OK, who put the carpet there?   Well, yes, when you have 1000 watts of audio power in many living rooms, you need something to dampen the sound, but there is an easier way of making things manageable than ruining your dance floor with woven nylon, don't you think?  See that knob on your stereo labeled "volume"?  There you go. 

Finally, let's get a good mens' suit (OK, even J.C. Penney's has that) and a good pair of men's shoes with a leather sole....OK, that's getting more and more difficult, and quite frankly, more and more expensive....

....on to the floor.  Now what do I notice when my little ones want to waltz with Daddy?  Daddy is getting very, very, very tired....OK, there is something very interesting about our society today.  Fifty years ago, our smoking fathers were able to whirl Mom around the floor for hours on end.   Now, Dad belongs to a health club, rides his bike to work, and comes no nearer tobacco than the six feet from the gas station counter to the cigarettes there, and he's wiped out after half the Blue Skirt Waltz.

Yeah, dancing is hard, and maybe it's time to take a look to the past for some hints on how to keep our bodies young and strong.


W.B. Picklesworth said...

This past year I've done a fair bit of dancing, but mostly with my son. He loves the spinning, the excitement of the music, getting hugged. It's easier to dance with him because my herky-jerkiness is a plus, not a minus.

Dancing is hard, like any other kind of thing, because it requires practice. Not just practice by yourself, but in coordination with another person. Much like marriage! But harder. At least for me. And yet... and yet I will learn, one day, if only for her.

Elspeth said...

I thought you were Baptist, LOL?

Bike Bubba said...

Ben: amen.

Terry: :^) I like to think that I'm a Baptist who never learned to love legalism and the rules of men.