Showing posts with label where poetry goes to be tortured. Show all posts
Showing posts with label where poetry goes to be tortured. Show all posts

Monday, October 12, 2015

Speaking of lumberjacks.....

.....apparently "Jihadi John" likes to do the tango with captive men.  Not that there's anything wrong or weird about that, of course, but somehow it brings this to mind.

Tuesday, January 08, 2013

Ode to the king of vehicles

....with all due respect, and many apologies, to ZZ Top.  Though really, it does seem to be the logical follow-on to their hit song.  No?


Hatchback, sliding doors

Pass out the books in case the kids are bored

V6, sun shades

And she’s a-thinkin’ that she’s got it made

She comes a runnin’ just as fast as she can

‘cause every mom’s crazy ‘bout a minivan



Loose jeans, Diamond ring

And she’s a-missin’ not a single thing

Diaper bag, running shoes

Don’t tick her off or you’re a-gonna lose

She comes a-runnin’ just as fast as she can

‘cause every mom’s crazy in a minivan



Six kids, in six seats

600 miles in the snow and sleet

Black tires, driving gloves

Lookin’ sharp with the products of love

She comes a runnin’ just as fast as she can

‘cause every mom loves her little minivan

Monday, April 16, 2012

In "honor" of some church music

I am no participant, if I can avoid it, in the worship (music) wars; given the choice, I would see both ancient and modern instruments, genre, and such in music--to the point where I would assert that a great arrangement for Isaac Watts could well be a heavy metal ballad.  Nay, I go further; at a certain point, I would argue that Chickenfoot might do better than a lot of church organists and worship teams, and not just because of the obvious skill of Anthony and Satriani.  Listening to the poem has a lot to do with the message, and those guys know how to listen to the poem and express it well.

Along those lines, there are some modern, and some ancient, songs where people have just forgotten the point where a song is a poem with a tune--somehow mumbling is good enough for them.  So in their dishonor, here's a little ditty. (with apologies to Elton Roth)

I have a song that someone gave me
It was sent from who knows where
and it's a good thing it was sent for free
for for a tune they did not care, cause


....in that song there is no melody
there is no melody, and not a harmony
in that song there is no melody,
there is no melody to sing...


I love to "serve" upon the praise team
it's so fun to stand up there
but every one below just wants to scream
that the tune they cannot bear, for

...in that song there is no melody
there is no melody, and not a harmony
In that song there is no melody
there is no melody to sing

I'll spare you the excruciation of a third verse, and my daughter notes that the namesake hymn (In my heart there rings a melody) doesn't have very good harmonies.  But that said, those who would obey Scripture and bring a new song into worship need to remember that if the tune doesn't lend itself to singing, neither does it lend itself to memory and teaching.  And here's something for fun.

Thursday, July 28, 2011

New song for finals from Campus Crusade/Cru

Sources unknown have provided me with a song which "Cru" members may soon be singing before finals, reflecting the true hope of many college students.  Here it is; let me know if you like it.

Pray Pray Pray
Pray Pray Pray
Pray for the Rapture

 
Oh the test is gonna come right after tonight
And you’ll blank when you see the first page
And don’t you try to lie
And don’t you dare deny
It’s a knife to your back,
engage!
Oh in all of your short life
You never saw such strife
My heads’ spinnin’ round and round
But in the seasons of shiver
We’ll write and deliver
Be strong and laugh and

Pray Pray Pray
Pray for the Rapture
Pray Pray Pray
Pray for the rapture!

Now you remember those days
When in the coffee shop you’d laze
And never open a book
Got no strength for the test
‘cause you spent your days in bed
Thought you’d learned it all before
Like a Cosa Nostra kiss
Putting danger on your lips
Might run scared for the door
But in the seasons of shiver
We’ll write and deliver
Be strong and laugh and

Pray Pray Pray
Pray for the Rapture
Pray Pray Pray
Pray for the Rapture!
 
Repeat verse 1
Repeat chorus twice

(with due apologies to Motley Crue, and of course I made this up.....)


Tuesday, July 26, 2011

Poetry in motion

My wife and I got to talking about what constitutes good music in the church, and the thought came to mind that one very important thing for music--whatever the genre--is that the poetic meter and scheme serve to commit the message to memory.  That is, there are various meters and rhyme schemes used in church music (and poetry in general), and when the author ignores the principles of poetry, what generally results (whatever else might be in the genre) is an eminently forgettable song.

Almost as if cued, our four year old son started singing a toilet training song set to Surfin' Safari:

Let's go poopin' now, everybody's learnin' how,
Poopin' on the potty with me!

Let's go poop, poop in the potty......

On the bright side, you now know that there is some good in the Beach Boys, as they've helped get my son out of diapers.  On the down side, you also know that it's not only the poetic meter, but also the content, of a song which matters.

Post-Script; The Brownsville Station/Campus Crusade for Christ song "Smokin' in the Boys' Room" has also been very helpful for toilet training.  And no, this blog has not, in fact, been taken over by either Learned Foot in its content, or W.B. Picklesworth for general poetical excellence.